Well I don't know where the second half of this year has gone but it has flown by. It seems like I've blinked and now Christmas is just twelve days away. It's all getting a bit festive 'round here. The tree is up and Harry is donning a new Christmas jumper daily. Indie prances around wearing reindeer ears daily and she is so excited for Santa to arrive. To a little one her age of course the presents and fuss is as much as she knows, but I'm getting great pleasure out of introducing her to all that comes with the festive season. She loves Christmas trees, fairy lights, the chocolate from her Advent Calender though to be honest the idea of Daddy being home for a good few weeks is probably what she's happiest about. 

Alongside the happiness and joy that the festive period is bringing us we've also had a teething, grouching little monkey on our hands. Harry's top two teeth are giving him a bit of trouble and he is so clingy, but we're getting there. Indie is also testing her boundaries alot too which has been interesting to say the least. It's amazing how much a developmental leap can temporarily change a little ones personality. It's all ups and downs but they're so worth it. 

In terms of how I've been feeling I feel like I'm doing pretty well. Having a toddler and a baby is hard in itself and has the potential to push you to your limits, let alone throwing Post Natal Depression into the mix. I am now off all medication and doing really well. I still have my down days but I don't feel like they're unmanagebale anymore. My CBT (Cognitive Behavour Therapy) is going really well and I'm learning quite alot about myself and ways to help my mental health. Things I'm finding specifically helpful are learning to 'live in the present' and I'm learning that alot of my thoughts, feeling and behaviours are linked and so I can help one by changing the other. It makes sense to me but I suppose as an outsider it may seem a bit odd. regardless I believe it's helping me. It's actually making me take some time to realise what is causing alot of my negative thoughts. Obviously depression in itself is the cause a lot of the time but I've also discovered that sometimes that has triggers; situations, negative thoughts etc. Anyway it's going to take time but I'm getting there. I'm facing a bit of a struggle with anxiety but being so aware of it is really helping me. I write EVERY feeling down now, the bad and the good, and it's helping me to discover issues that I didn't even realise were there and has given me the ability to deal with them before they spiral.

Hubby is working right up until the day before Christmas Eve this year so we haven't got too many festive plans before Christmas but we're looking forward to the time as a family. We're hoping to get on a few winter walks to let Indie run off some of her energy and whilst at first we considered it, we think we're going to leave meeting Santa until next year. Indie's a little shy of meeting new people, especially men for some reason so we'll see the big man another time. 

What are you doing in the run up to Christmas?

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